Lin sent this copy from a grief book she is reading. I think it would be helpful for all of us to make copies and put them somewhere. I am going to make copies to hang at work, home, car, and most importantly my forehead. Thanx Lin!
Dear : Insert appropriate title here
Recently I have suffered the devastating loss of my father. I am grieving and it will take months and even years to recover from this loss.
I want to let you know that I will cry from time to time. I don't apologize for my tears since they are not a sign of weakness or a lack of faith. They are God's gift to me to express the extent of my loss, and they are also a sign that I am recovering.
At times you may see me angry for no apparent reason. Sometimes I'm not sure why. All I know is that my emotions are intense because of my grief. If I don't always make sense to you, please be forgiving and patient with me. And if I repeat myself again and again, please accept this is normal.
More than anything else, I need your understanding and your presence. You don't always have to know what to say or even say anything if you don't know how to respond. Your presence and a touch or hug lets me know you care. Please don't wait for me to call you since sometimes I am too tired or tearful to do so.
If I tend to withdraw from you, please don't let me do that. I need you to reach out to me for several months or even years.
Pray for me that I will come to see meaning in my loss someday and that I will know God's comfort and love. It does help to let me know that you are praying for me.
If you have experienced a similar type of loss, please feel free to share it with me. It will help rather than cause me to feel worse. And don't stop sharing if I begin to cry. It's all right and any tears you express as we talk are all right too.
This loss is so painful, and right now it feels like the worst thing that could ever happen to me. But I will survive and eventually recover. I cling to that knowledge, even though there are times I don't feel it. I know that I will not always feel as I do now. Laughter and joy will emerge once again someday.
Thank you for caring about me. Thank you for listening and praying. Your concern comforts me and is a gift for which I will always be thankful.
Your name here
*Make as many copies as needed. Distribute accordingly, but if you are caught throwing them at someone you will be kicked out of group.